At
a sewing class in Kabul, a group of women are learning to smile again.
Among the survivors of the continuous shellfire and fighting that has typified
the Afghan capital for the last five years, they are particularly vulnerable
by virtue of their status in Islamic society - they are widows. The world
of the traditional Afghan wife is protected and secure within the extended
network of her husband’s family. Her life is shaped and directed by that
family and her activities revolve solely around the maintenance of the
housedhold and the rearing of children. Most Afghan women are illiterate,
and in contrast to woman’s role in other societies, will not deal with
household finances. Many women will rarely leave their homes unescorted,
even to shop in the marketplace. The death of a husband very often turns
the widow into a liability for the husband’s family, which will itself
be struggling to survive as a result of the war. If she has healthy male
children, the widow has a chance of making a living through them. If she
has only daughters, the burden is doubled because of their low status.
As the extended family begins to fragment under the economic pressure of
war, it is the widows who will be most quickly excluded from the economic
and social support system. Once cast adrift, the women have little chance
of earning a living. They may get some seasonal work in the fields, or
housekeeping, but once they have sold off any valuables, many are reduced
to borrowing, begging and even prostitution. Many live for days with nothing
to eat but bread and tea, and every ounce of their energy is spent on providing
food for their children. For 2,200 of the widows of Kabul, their lifeline
is a project run by CARE International and funded by the ODA. The project
provides training in sewing, embroidery and knitting in return the widows
receive food in exchange for the garments they produce. The clothes are
sold at subsidised prices to other aid organisations for distribution in
displaced people’s camps. Tiny rooms in the poorest parts of town fill
with women whose strong, tragic faces tell of the grief and hardship they
have endured over the past years - every one has a heart-breaking story
to tell. And it is in the telling of these stories, as much as in the learning
of skills, that the women’s groups have come to play such an important
part in the society of the widows. For most of the women, the groups are
the first chance they have had for years to share their experiences within
a supportive, constructive social network. Visitors are plied with tea
and biscuits, even though the women themselves are barely eating. Many
of them sit shyly, quietly sewing (just a few days of training sees them
producing exquisitely embroidered work), but after a while even the less
confident among them volunteer some details about their lives. They speak
of dead husbands, wounded and traumatised children, of the horror of rockets
failing randomly from the sky, and of the endless quest for food. When
a visitor asks whether any of their children has eaten a piece of fruit
recently, they laugh, saying that it has been so long since they were able
to afford fruit or vegetables, they gave no idea any more what the prices
are in the market place. As each one talks, eyes around the room fill with
tears. These women live weighed down by permanent state of depression which
far outweighs any western concept of stress. They speak of their "nerves"
night-mares, chronic stomach complaints, weeping, heart palpitations and
migraine. All of them say agian and again how much the sewing groups mean
to them how good it is to meet and talk while working, and how they hope
and pray the CARE will continue to find the funds to keep the project going.
Most of these women are illiterate, largely unskilled and unaccustomed
to making choices in life; for them the sewing groups represent all there
is of the future. However, the confidence and camaraderie which the women
have gathered from the groups has begun to motivate them and it is quite
clear that their first concern is for their children’s education. The worst
of the year is still to come-in winter the temperatures go down to way
below freezing; heating fuel is as hard to come by as food, and the militias
traditionally step up their shelling of the city, knowing the havoc they
can wreak on a population huddled inside for warmth. Even with emergency
feeding programmes, it is difficult to imagine the degree of hardship these
women will face during the cold months. Their extraordinary courage and
resilience leaves no doubt of the enormous value of the small contribution
that such aid projects can make to their lives.
The Muslim, December 13,1996
Afghan widows in the fetters of the fundamentalism
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